Who is Lady Imperatrix?
Hello, my name is Lady Imperatrix and I most humbly welcome you to my world. My full title is Her Imperial Highness, Lady Imperatrix, Empress of Imaginarium Terram Sua, Stultitia, Rationem Non Linearibus and Adlucinatio, Lator Pacis, Explorator Ex Corporis Usum; Queen of Bohemicum Vitae, Voluptatum Prosecutionem, and Conquiescamus Tempore; Princess of Teatime, Cherries, and Lemonade; Seneschal of Silliness Maximus; Imperial Companion of the most Ancient and most Noble order of the Mushroom; Bearer of the Grand Cross of the Most Honourable Order of the Bubble Bath…but that is a quite a bit to say and even more to write, so my friends just call me Trix. Those who are not my friends simply don’t call me. Which is really quite fine with me as I never answer my phone anyway.
The story of my birth is quite long and involved but for now, suffice to say that once upon a time there was a lonely unicorn named Artemisia, who wished for a friend and traveling companion. As the wish was so deeply heartfelt and Artemisia was such a very nice unicorn, her wish touched the heart of the goddess Nyx, who in turn ever so kindly, created me. Nyx called upon The Great Purple Mystic Eldorn (with whom she was great friends), to bring physicality to my being. Eldorn set to work one night deep in a pine forest, and before you could say “sesquipedalianism” (a word that is not often used but looks rather lovely on the page), he had found the most beautiful mushroom in all the land, just the place for me to sprout. With a wave of his hand and some decidedly complicated magic words, the mushroom’s mycelium giggled and twitched, then gathered itself together and…voilà! My little head popped up from the earth, right under the mushroom’s cap, my arrival being greeted by lovely amethyst spores dropping down upon my newly formed head.
From there it was just a matter of growing and learning, of which I did both in great quantity. In my long and very interesting life, I have traveled to many interesting places, met many interesting people, and had a very…well, interesting time indeed. Now in this phase of my life, I’m looking forward to all the enchantment that is to come.
After all, you’re here. It’s getting wonderfully delightful already.
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